Barbara Ann Kissinger was her name. I do not remember the first time I met her. She first appeared in my life as the sister in law of the church's new Music Director. When she came into my circle of friends I was dating Debbie and I do believe I was in love at that point in my life. Debbie and I had been together for a year or so though now it feels like we had been together much longer. Later in life Barbara would tell me that when her friends from school were telling her about the other youth at her new church they would single me and Debbie out and tell her "That's Bill and Debbie ... they're inseparable". Debbie and I weren't inseparable though. Just a few months after Barbara was told that as a fact, Debbie and I had a talk in her parent's basement where I was told that maybe we should just remain friends. It hurt but I respected Debbie far too much to fight her about her thoughts. I graciously accepted the fact that we were not to be and walked away alone. I was never one to be over run with females that were interested in me so I was able to adjust back into single mode of life fairly quickly and easily.
The common denominator between Barbara and myself was my very good friend Valerie. Val and I had been friends for years and were pretty close. It was Valerie who I shared my first kiss with in the boiler room of the church one Wednesday night. Valerie was two years older than me and we talked about many intimate things. Among those things was the fact that I had never really kissed girl in a deep and sensual way. Valerie, being the great friend that she was, offered to help me along in learning the basics of romance, which was greatly appreciated and enjoyed.
Barbara and Val were two grades ahead of me in school even though they both were just a little more than a year older than me. This was because the school district had a promotion date of October 1 of each year. Barbara being born in September of 1955 would graduate in 1973 while I being born in October of 1956 would not graduate until 1975. I never understood why the district settled on October as the cut off date instead of sometime in the summer months which would have made more sense to me. However that was the setup and as a result Barbara was one of the youngest in her class while I was one of the oldest in mine.
It was towards the end of the school year in May of 1973 when Barbara, Val and their classmates began to plan for their big graduation night. All of the girls had a date except for Barbara and so she and Val started the search for a likely candidate. I am not sure which of the girl's idea it was but one of them recalled that I was recently free from Debbie and that I might be willing to escort Barbara on her big day. Barbara had shown an interest in me lately but she didn't want to seem to forward and so it was decided that Val would put out feelers to me on whether I might be interested in the idea. The thing to remember is that Val and I were very close. You might say she was my best friend at school. We shared a locker together which was unique since she was a senior and I was a lowly sophomore.
On that particular morning I met Val at the locker as usual.
"You know Barb Kissinger from church?" she asked with that wry smile of hers.
"From church? Not sure. Why?"
"You know, Jerry and Nancy's sister. Short? Like me. How would you like to tag along to the senior party after graduation with her .... and me and Robert." She had a little grin on her face as she reached for her textbook for her class. "You know Barb. She sings in the choir. There! Right there. Remember her now?"
I turned and looked to my side and saw a short brunette walking past. She turned her head slightly and glanced at me. When our eyes met she dropped her head and increased her pace a little bit. I recognized her as being the little sister of the music director's wife.
"Oh yeah. I remember her." I then felt like I should add a caveat to my recollection. "I mean I don't really KNOW her. Just know who she is. So I would be, like, her date?"
Val flashed a quick grin at me.
"Date? I guess you call it that. Party is at King Louie after graduation. Sheryl and her boyfriend, me and Robert and you and Barb? Think you can go? It would be almost an all nighter."
I was not sure how to answer this proposition that came out of the blue. I couldn't give an answer on the spot unless it was a "no". I would have to ask mom and dad about this and that wasn't exactly a cool answer to give.
"I dunno Val. I'll have to see." avoiding the question for the time being.
Val tilted her head. "Well it's in a couple of weeks. It'll be fun and Barb is really nice. Come on you'd like her and just between you and me, she really likes you."
Val turned quickly and waved over her head as she walked away.
"See you at lunch! Have a fun with your math!" she called out as she left
I did not know what to think. I had a hard time keeping focused on Mrs. Skaggs algebra class as I tried to form a picture of Barb in my mind. I did know who she was but had not really paid much attention to her. I had a lot of things going on at the church and I had been trying to keep my mind off of the situation with Debbie to take notice of a relatively new girl at the church.
That night as I lay in bed trying to get to sleep Val's voice kept running through my mind. "She really likes you". She was cute. She had a nice smile. She was very short. Then again, short isn't that big of a deal. I could look past that. Being at the senior party would be kind of neat. I had a few friends in the class of '73 and Val would be there to rescue me if things with south for some reason. I decided to see what mom thought about it on Saturday. I figured it couldn't hurt to ask. It actually could be an exciting.
I approached mom Saturday afternoon before I went to play basketball with Larry and Ronnie at the church parking lot. All my chores were complete so I figured I should talk to her about it while I was still in her good graces. I found her a little apprehensive when I explained the details of the approaching night. Val would be with me. Yes it would be late into the night but Val would be there. It would be a highly chaperoned party at a well known venue and Val would be there. This girl I was taking was Nancy Olthoff's little sister AND Val would be there. Actually I would REALLY be going with Val and just hanging around with this Barb girl .... whoever she was. As I watched her look at me as she was thinking my thought was "well, this is going to be a big no".
"Let me talk to your dad about this. You be home for supper?" she was standing with her hand on her hip as I grabbed my basketball to head out.
"Unless Ronnie's mom asks me to stay to eat, sure." I grabbed my keys to head over to Ronnie's. Talking to dad was for sure a positive for me. That meant she was leaning towards being okay with it and just telling dad what I had planned. Sure enough when dad and I got home from work on Monday mom gave me the green flag to go out with the seniors after graduation.
I didn't see Barb much over the next week or so. I talked to her a little at church as the day approached just to get a feel for her. She was nice, Val was right about that. She was cute with a nice smile but she didn't seem to know music very well. I noticed that when I was talking to Ronnie about a new album that had been released she had not shown any interest or knowledge about it. This was a little discomforting but not enough for me to back out of the Senior Party coming up. I could overlook a few important things just to get through that night. It would not be a problem in my mind.
The day of graduation finally arrived and along with it some devastating news. The morning of graduation, Val's boyfriend Robert had been arrested and was currently in the county jail. He had been caught on security cams defacing the building of a rival high school the previous night. No one knew why he had done this. Val was crushed. I found out when Val picked me up to go to the LDS Auditorium where the graduation traditionally took place. I could tell something was wrong when I got in her little green Ford Pinto. Her eyes were red as she tearfully told me she would not be going to the after party. I spent the whole ride across town trying to change her mind and to go. From my perspective this could bring big trouble to me if Val did not go. We arrived at the auditorium in Independence and as we parted ways Val said she probably would go. We agreed on a place to meet after graduation and I entered to mostly empty auditorium to wait to see the ceremony to be followed by a long night of celebration with the new graduates of the Class of 1973 of Ruskin High School.
The ceremony was a long one as all of them from Ruskin High School were back in those days. I knew what I was in for as I remembered sitting through my sister's graduation the previous year. One by one the graduates would be announced as they walked across the stage to receive a book like holder for their diploma but without an actual diploma inside of it. Those would be mailed to the graduates later. I sat through the whole thing watching many friends from both school and my church go through the ritual of passing into adulthood like so many before them. I thought of Val as I sat there listening to the speeches. Val walked across the stage with her head held high masking the heartache that she was carrying. I watched as Barb, my companion for the next few hours, walked and graduated. After about two hours or so (probably longer) I went to meet Val, Barb and the others that would be riding together to King Louie to celebrate the end of their public education careers.
We all rode in separate cars to a shopping center where we left all the cars and to consolidate into one car for the ride over to King Louie West. Val sat in the back seat with me and Barb silently running things through her mind about everything that had happened in the last 24 hours. The King Louie facility was over on the Kansas side of town. I had never been there before and have only returned once or twice since that night. It was huge. They had a huge arcade, a billiards room with dozens of pool tables. There was a hockey size skating rink, dozens of bowling lanes. In short just about everything you could want if you were going to spend the better part of the night there.
Barb walked by my side as we entered. She was in a great mood with a big smile on her face. She informed me that she had never been ice skating but she had played pool. Her father had a pool table in their basement at home. She had been bowling before but she thought she would have a difficult time at the pinball machines because of her height and short arms. After talking a bit the group of us decided to bowl a few frames first. Only four of us bowled as Val wandered along with the group not saying much and not feeling up to doing anything. After bowling the group spent a little time on the pool tables splitting up into couples after that. Val went and sat at the concession drowning her sorrows in Coca-Cola. Barb and I started walking around observing other graduates and stopping to talk to them once in awhile. Eventually we found ourselves at the skating rink as we found our conversation stalling.
"Want to skate?" she asked as she stopped walking to stare out at the ice.
"I guess. You want to?"
"I never have but sure, I'll try it if you stay by me." she asserted. Just then one of her classmates came crashing into the wall and fell to a stop flat on her posterior in front of us.
"You sure you want to?" I asked her with a smile. She gave a slight chuckle and affirmed that since everyone else seemed to be having a rough go of it, why not as long as I stayed close to her.
We went to get our skates. She wore a size 6. Tiny little skates that looked like they would fit on a fourth grader. We sat and I laced up my skates while she worked on getting hers on. I went ahead out onto the ice while she was working on it. I was pretty athletic growing up with good coordination and quick reflexes. I was very surprised at how easy ice skating was to me. The only problem that I encountered was figuring out how to stop. I found it very much like roller skating. I took a few laps totally enjoying the new experience and for a short while forgot all about Barb, my date for the night, preparing for her maiden attempt on the ice. As I came around on another lap I suddenly saw her on the glassy surface. She was holding onto the side rail for dear life, slowly trying to work her way around the rink. The next time I came up on her I slammed myself into the wall in front of her. It was the only way I knew how to stop. She gave out a little squeal of surprise when I banged into the wall.
"You said you had never done this before" she laughed out.
"I haven't. I swear. You want some help?"
"YES! This is crazy!" she exclaimed with that beautiful smile. I do think that was the first time I truly noticed how beautiful that smile was. It was a smile that I would never forget. I took one of her hands while she used the other one to hold onto the railing and we slowly made our way around the rink a few times. We would hold hands the rest of the night.
The party officially ended as far as King Louie and the school were concerned at around 3 in the morning. We met up with the rest of the group that had ridden over together to head out to finish off the night. Barb and I sat in the back seat with Val holding hands. We ended up at Terrace Lake Shopping Center where we had left the other cars. Someone found a Frisbee in one of the cars and we spent the next hour or so tossing it between us. It wasn't long before someone noticed the time and suggested we all head home. It was around four in the morning as we headed to our cars.
"You riding home with Val?" Barb asked in an almost hoping way.
"Yeah I think I should. She's had a rough night."
Barb understood the situation with Val and agreed. Just before I go into Val's car Barb came running up to the window.
"Here." She handed me a small piece of paper. "My phone number if you want to call. I had fun. Thanks"
"I had fun to. It was a good time. I'll call you"
And with that the short little girl with the beautiful smile slid into her Chevy and drove off. It was the first night of what would become a lifetime together. A lifetime that was cut off to short but also a lifetime that would be filled to capacity with sharing, living and loving.
It was only the beginning.
